


of cloves and nightshade (of oaths that will fade)

by deadcereus



Category: Cookie Run (Video Game)
Genre: & gore & thirst, Alternate Universe, Bamboo Bandits are Peach's semi-reformed uncles, Bonfires, Character Parallels, Death, Eldritch Abominations, Elephants, Family Feels, Family Issues, Frankenstein Themes, Golems, Gore, Human/Spirit AU, Implied/Referenced Torture, Innuendo, Kidnapping, Magic, Magical Artifacts, Multi, Mystery, Queerplatonic Relationships, Rated For Violence, Red Herrings, Red's a Flaming Bi Wreck, Road Trip, Sharing a Bed, Swearing, Violence, accidental adoption, literally sets himself on fire
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-08-17
Updated: 2019-08-17
Packaged: 2020-09-01 17:41:05
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,684
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20261977
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/deadcereus/pseuds/deadcereus
Summary: Rangsiman—better known as Red Pepper in Thai boxing circles—needs to punch himself into the exosphere, stat. How could he have reached his twenties without noticing his two best friends are stupidly attractive?! What's more, they're oblivious. Painfully so.Then that becomes the least of his problems when unrest in Spirit World spills over to his and mythical gods become real... and achinglyhuman.Between uncovering a series of kidnapping plots, fighting off rogue spirits infecting innocents, and grappling with new secrets brought to light from unexpected places, he'll eventually learn how to not be a constant fire hazard around his hot friends, right?(He should've known bi now that this wouldn't end well.)





	of cloves and nightshade (of oaths that will fade)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Names:**
> 
> Red Pepper: Rangsiman Pramoj  
First name Rangsiman for the Sun, plus a Thai surname.  
Nickname: Daeng. (Means red. It's a fairly common Thai practice to have nicknames, according to multiple websites.)
> 
> Peach: Sun Mengtao (孙梦桃)  
Surname Sun after Sun Wukong (the Monkey King from Chinese mythology), first name Mengtao for "to dream" + "peach."
> 
> Plum: Hong Lizi (洪离梓)  
Surname Hong for "flood/big/grand." Lizi for "to leave/be independent of." If written differently, hong can mean "red" & lizi can mean "plum."
> 
> Popcorn: Poppy Cornell  
Cornell sounds like kernel. (A lot of the human names will spell out the name of the Cookie if you cross out some letters. Popcorn & the Citrus Squad are examples of this. I'll add in the names when the character appears in the fic.)
> 
> **Notes on the AU:**   
_Most Cookies & pets are spirits, but the more "modern day" Cookies are humans. Also, humans often form contracts with spirits for magical powers in this AU. Sometimes spirits stay with the family for multiple generations, like Paprika with Red Pepper. Also, magic affects DNA somewhat, so wacky hair colors are normal here. Assume that most of the cast are in their 20s, unless implied otherwise._
> 
> _Enjoy! The darker themes come later in the story._

* * *

Rangsiman remembers the terrible day when a video of him casually eating habanero peppers like grapes went viral. The Internet exploded, his fanbase tripled in one night, and suddenly Muay Thai was all the rage for a few glorious (read: mentally scarring) weeks.

The memes still haunt him to this day.

He's been stuck with the moniker Red Pepper ever since. The one good thing to come of out that mess was Poppy's self-appointment as his PR manager. A literal angel. Her mastery of social media was a godsend, and she graciously handled everything for him.

His sister, on the other hand, was wholly unsympathetic and teased him relentlessly. Still does. There was never concrete evidence that she was the one responsible, but it couldn't have been anyone else.

That video was his dark history. Nothing that life could possibly dish out could outrank his immortalization as an Internet meme in terms of sheer embarrassment.

Or so he thought.

Life apparently took that as a challenge and years later, _spectacularly _outdid itself with its cruelest innovation in torture yet: awareness.

_What did I do to deserve this?_

* * *

It started out innocently enough.

Rangsiman wasn't one to turn down an invitation to the Stone Temple very often. Why would he want to refuse the opportunity to measure his skills against Lizi and Mengtao, and to benefit from Master Prune's watchful tutelage and grow as a Muay Thai practitioner? 

The appeal of sampling Panda Dumpling's latest dishes didn't hurt either.

This visit was just like the others—they did warm-ups, they trained, they swapped stories and training tips—and now he and Mengtao were taking a break while Master Prune was teaching Lizi how to swim.

Nothing out of the ordinary there.

But today, he couldn't help sneaking glances at Mengtao, her mouth and collar carelessly askew, her hair loose and still damp from her shower. The way she scaled a bookshelf with practiced ease and draped her limbs haphazardly over her perch, much like a self-satisfied cat that found the perfect place to nap.

He turned away, cheeks feeling strangely hot. _Get yourself together, it's just Mengtao. You've known her for years,_ he reasoned. _Yeah, it's weird that a determined fighter like her enjoys slacking off so much, but that isn't anything new. No need to stare._

Idly, she poked a scroll with her staff. "This is boring. Ugh, how come Lizi gets to swim but we don't? I wanna swim too!"

Her wet hair was clinging to her bare neck. Rangsiman's blush deepened and he had to forcefully wrench his traitorous head to the opposite direction.

_Don't stare_.

"Yeah." He prayed that Mengtao wouldn't ask why it took him so long to reply.

"I can't believe Master gave us _chores_ on top all of our training sessions," she complained. "Hey, mind if I take a quick snooze? You can join me if you want. If we're found out, you'll get a lighter punishment 'cause you're a guest. Master's a real softie for guests." Patting the spot next to her, she said, "C'mon, join me, Daeng! You know you want to. Trust me, not even Lizi finds sorting scrolls fun."

His gaze zeroed in on the dimple in her left cheek that was just _begging_ to be kissed. _No no no, Mengtao's not supposed to be CUTE. That's not how the world works._ "No thanks, I'm good. The sooner I get this done, the sooner I can get back to training."

She shrugged, sounding mystified that he'd willingly pass up a chance to nap. "Alright, suit yourself. See ya in ten."

_Stop staring!_

Except he couldn't stop staring, and it wasn't the _why-would-you-actively-seek-out-stagnation_ kind of stare. It was more of a _my-best-friend-gives-me-butterflies-and-I'm-having-a-crisis _kind of stare.

Unbidden, a long and slow "fuckkkk" dragged itself out from his lips.

_I'm so doomed. _

* * *

It only escalated from there.

Not at first, no. It crept in slowly, like a vine coiling around a tree and making itself at home; like tree roots steadily cracking a building's foundations; like minor earthquakes rippling out and quietly laying the grounds for a mighty tsunami.

After all, Rangsiman's greatest weakness was falling for feints.

* * *

After fleeing from the temple like a coward, he dived into his training with renewed fervor. Even Paprika was taken aback. He didn't care. Embracing exertion as a welcome distraction, he set his social life aside until sanity reappeared two weeks later, beat off the intrusive thoughts about Mengtao's slightly chapped lips, and knocked some sense into him.

"Sweet, sweet sanity." He did not weep in relief, but came very close. A manful tear might've been shed though as his knees hit the floor. "I'm sorry I took you for granted. Please never abandon me again." Knuckles stinging from paprika spice was a small price to pay for the return of normality. He raised a fist in triumph.

In contrast, Paprika was more of a deflated lump than a punching bag. A proud, happy lump, but a lump nonetheless.

Rangsiman's impromptu victory dance was interrupted with an offensively loud ring.

_Oh, it's _her.

Running to the staircase, he pried up the floorboard of the fifth stair, searching through his collection of burner phones until he found the one that was flashing.

"I swear, if that stupid sister of mine wants me to bail her out, I'll punch her creepy talking daggers until they're a smear on the wall..." He pressed the answer button and said irritably, "So what did you do THIS time?"

"Well, well, well. Is that any way to talk to your childhood role model?"

"Cut to the chase," he snapped. "Unless you're announcing your retirement from your current lifestyle, I don't want to hear it."

"No need to be short with me." A pause, and Rangsiman would eat his bandages if she wasn't smirking. "Though I suppose it's impossible for you."

"If you think a short joke will rile me up, then you've lost your touch."

"Tsk, tsk. You're the one who insisted I call every so often, despite it being bad for me to develop patterns—those rulebook-fuckers do love their patterns. Though it's hilarious that anything they can't predict or understand makes them itch like mad. So much for their lauded _seers_." She clicked her tongue. "If I had a dime for every time those incompetent mutts worked themselves and the media up in a frenzy, I'd be rich."

"Yeah, yeah, yeah. Anything else I need to know?"

"Nah, it's good. Nice weather, all sunny and shit. Say hi to the moron I threatened to smother with zombie stickers back when we were brats." They both knew she meant the next burner phone. "Man, that takes me back. You were an even bigger crybaby than you are now, always so scared of the fun stuff. Bwa-ha-ha, I bet you still don't watch movies that show guts, since you got none!"

"Shut up."

"Ooh, struck a nerve there, didn't I? Well, gotta go! I can already see the coppers waiting to clasp silvers 'round my wrists. As if I'll let them. There's still gold in the world that isn't mine yet." Then she laughed, bold and bright and dangerous, a sure sign that meant she was up to no good. "Time to make it rain."

_Click._

"Always _has_ to be the one to hang up first." He burned the phone and disposed of the ashes without a second thought. Getting rid of the evidence was habitual by now. "Why can't she just be a law-abiding citizen, with normal hobbies that don't include stealing national treasures and seducing lonely female millionaires?"

Paprika rose, revitalized by his energy potion and no longer a lump. "Just like how Muay Thai is yer way of life, amassin' wealth and thrill-seekin' is hers. Ya have no choice but ta live with it." 

"But she has a choice to _not_ live like that," he said bitterly.

"Don't dwell on things ya can't change. _Never back, always forward_, ain't that yer motto?"

With a groan, he asked, "Would it kill you to not make so much sense?"

"Eh, accordin' ta human definitions, I ain't alive. I make sense 'cause I've been by yer side since ya were but a wee lad. And reply to yer texts before Miss Sun makes good on her vow ta break in and check in on ya. If that happens, I ain't helpin' with the clean up."

"Right." Rangsiman went to his room and retrieved his phone, reassuring Mengtao that she didn't need to break into his house and he's sorry for getting caught up in training and neglecting her texts, really, so please don't be mad anymore, okay?

Naturally, he gets roped into buying lychee bubble tea as an apology. Typical Mengtao.

After a short chat with Poppy about an upcoming movie starring a well-known capoeirista, his thumb pauses over an unexpected message.

Lizi  
  
**Yesterday** 9:04 PM  
Come to the temple. Mengtao says she misses you.  


Gingerly, he placed his phone on his table, as if it was made of something incredibly precious.

He took a deep breath.

Rangsiman buried his red face into a pillow and _screamed_.

"What's wrong?!" Paprika burst in, scanning the room for any sign of danger. Upon finding none, his line of sight fell on Rangsiman, who was still face-down into his pillow and kicking his legs up in the air.

"Uh." He backed away several meters. "Keep doin' whatever it is that yer doin', I guess."

"He _texted_ me."

"Who?"

"_Hong Lizi_ texted me."

"Ah, that stoic young man. Didn't ya once say Miss Sun forced him ta get a phone but he treats it like a stopwatch?"

"Yeah."

Paprika whistled. "Ya must've worried him real bad then. Ta be honest, ya had me a lil worried too. Ain't nothin' wrong with workin' hard, but it ain't good ta overexert yerself like ya did. Been a long while since I had ta whip up a potion instead of relyin' on my natural healin'."

With a grimace, he said, "Sorry. I got carried away."

"Don't be. Just remember ta ease up next time."

"I will."

"So what did yer friend say ta getcha all worked up?" he probed, immediately regretting it when Rangsiman resumed screaming into his pillow.

Once he calmed down a bit, he said in awed disbelief, "Not only did he invite me to the temple—which he never does _ever_, it's always Mengtao or Master Prune—but he said that she misses me. What does that mean? He's not the type to say something like that unless it _means_ something." He clutched his pillow so hard that some of the stuffing leaked out. "Is he trying to say he misses me too? Wait, he's not Mengtao, so why am I reacting like this?! Argh!"

"Sometimes I find myself wantin' a hand," Paprika murmured wistfully. "But the waste of spiritual energy ta manifest one ain't worth it. It just ain't."

He blinked, confused at the non-sequitur. "What?"

"I got the strong urge ta, how do ya youngsters say it again?" He creased his forehead. "Facepalm. That's the word, innit?"

A beat. "Don't take this the wrong way, but I wish I could punch you right now."

"What's stoppin' ya?"

"Not for training," he clarified. "Just a normal punch. But it wouldn't be satisfying, since you can't feel pain."

Paprika made a sympathetic notice. "I see. That must be frustratin'. Too bad ya have no methods in yer arsenal that could inflict pain upon me. Few do. Hmm, Master Prune does, but humans can't learn spirit techniques. Puts too much stress on their bodies. The backlash..." He went quiet. "It ain't pretty, that's all I hafta say."

"Oh."_ Seems like a sensitive topic_. "Don't worry, between Muay Thai and obscure spirit techniques, it's no contest. I'll always choose Muay Thai."

"There's a good lad," he said in approval. "Don't forget to answer yer friend."

"Oh yeah, thanks for reminding me." Rangsiman picked up his phone.

Lizi  
  
**Yesterday** 9:04 PM  
Come to the temple. Mengtao says she misses you.  
  
**Today** 5:28 AM  
gimme an hour and i'll be there

Putting his phone down, he mumbled, "He said that Mengtao misses me. I mean, she did say that in her texts with a ton of sad faces and heart emojis, but she does stuff like that all time! But if Lizi thought it merited a mention, then it's true. She _misses_ me." Rangsiman rolled over, giggling like a madman, and fought the impulse to start kicking the bed again. The mental picture of Mengtao moping about because of _him_ made him feel all warm and fluttery inside. "Aahhh, what am I gonna do?!"

"Maybe stop mutilatin' yer pillows," Paprika Punching Bag suggested wryly.

Sheepishly, he let go of the poor thing and leapt to his feet. "That's right, I have to go to the temple or else I'll be late!"

"Y'know, if ya took the car, the trip would take 10 minutes tops."

"But I don't need the car," he said, genuinely puzzled. "I got my gloves, water bottle, bandages, towel, deodorant, phone, and a change of clothes. That can fit into my duffel bag, no problem. It's not like I'm carrying anything heavy, so why drive when I can warm up with a jog?"

"Never mind." Paprika harrumphed. "Get your terms straight. A jog ain't 11 kilometers per hour; that's a relatively low runnin' pace. Do we need another trainin' session with my clones and me? I don't remember teachin' ya ta be all muscle and no brain."

"Rude," he retorted halfheartedly, heading towards the door. "C'mon, let's get going already."

Once Rangsiman was out of earshot, Paprika grumbled, "That hopeless boy. He kicks up a hormone-fueled fuss and just when I thought he recovered, he goes and does somethin' like this. Learned nothin' from the past two weeks."

* * *

Rangsiman swallowed roughly.

_Today I've learned that Lizi should be banned from removing his robes forever because that sleeveless,_ skintight _black undershirt has to be a threat to public safety._

At least Paprika wasn't here to witness this. He had left earlier with the excuse of, "Someone has ta go protect Panda Dumpling and their cart from grubby hooligans."

_Mengtao, where are you? I could really use a buffer right now._

On second thought, maybe not. Having her here would be twice as stressful.

"Your hand wraps are sloppy," Lizi remarked, as if that wasn't his fault, that—that inconsiderate jerk!

Distracted, he didn't see him reach out until his long, slender fingers encircled Rangsiman's wrist.

"Eep," he squeaked as Lizi inspected his hand closely.

_A few centimeters more and he would be kissing my hand._ His head went dizzy at the thought. _Oh gods, if Mengtao wasn't bad enough, now I have to deal with a stupid crush on Lizi too. Was he always this handsome, and can I get him to stop?_ _Because this is_ _so_ _not fair._

"Come."

He choked, caught off-guard. "What?!"

"You're coming with me. If you're careless enough to mess up on your hand wraps, then I can't trust you to give it your all. In this state, you'd hardly put up a decent challenge. Sparring can wait."

"But I'm fine! Just gimme a sec, I'll—"

"No." He narrowed his eyes and _wow_ it must be hot out today, because Rangsiman was suddenly sweating buckets. "Your hands are your weapon, your pride. Protect them."

"O-oh." He blushed all over. 

_Oh no. He's handsome AND surprisingly sweet? I'm gonna die, and worst of all, I'm starting to think it might not be such a bad way to go._

"Shouldn't you know this by now? You're a _boxer_," he said incredulously. "Are you still the same opponent I've lost to multiple times? How shameful."

_I take everything back._ "Thank fuck, you're back to normal."

"Watch it. I don't care how you speak outside, but your obscene language is not to be tolerated within the temple's premises."

_Please, the only thing that's obscene here is how that shirt leaves nothing to imagination. _

"There's something off about you today. Whatever's affecting you must be worse than I thought." He placed a tentative hand on Rangsiman's shoulder and steered him towards the temple. "Let's go inside and find Master—he'll know what to do."

_Or the way I'm drooling over Lizi like he's a piece of meat,_ he thought, guilt washing over him.

"I can walk on my own."

"Good." He dropped his hand, and Rangsiman wasn't sure if he should mourn the loss of his touch or breathe a sigh of relief. "Follow me."

That was a mistake, because he was assaulted by the full view of his toned back.

_May the stars and tides have mercy on me._

He envisioned himself mapping out every contour and curve with his tongue, unraveling his bun and composure as he pulled him into a bruising kiss and Lizi pushed him down onto his bed, half-lidded eyes glinting in challenge and—

Right then and there, he knew he was truly and completely fucked.

Again.

(Two weeks of avoidance didn't solve the problem. It only made it so much _worse_.)

Distantly, he heard Lizi shouting.

Something soft and orange hit him in the face. It smelled nice—like cardamom, sandalwood and... smoke?

"What's wrong with you?! Put that fire out before you burn the training ground down!" 

He looked down. "Ah."

_"Don't just stand there, do something!"_

Too stunned to do anything else, he obediently reined the flames back in.

They stood in silence.

Surrounded by blackened grass and the charred remains of Lizi's robe, he could only think of one thing to say: "Well, shit."

Lizi didn't reprimand him for language this time.

* * *

"My, my," Master Prune said indulgently, wrinkles appearing more prominent to hide a growing smile. "I cannot say I expected this, but I should have remembered that the indiscretions of youth are often unpredictable."

"Master, this is no laughing matter. Training Ground Three has sustained"—Lizi's eyes slid to Rangsiman—"admittedly minor fire damage, but this is not a mere infraction that can be easily dismissed. However, if this disciple may be so bold..." His formal tone slipped as he knelt before his master. "I would like to receive Rangsiman's punishment in his steed. He isn't feeling well today and I failed to notice it early enough. Forgive me."

_Now I feel like a jackass. Might as well stamp it on my forehead to seal the deal._ Still, Rangsiman couldn't bring himself to interrupt. Not when he could accidentally blurt out something self-incriminating, like _hi yes I've recently been fantasizing about your beloved students, please don't Mustache Blast me into oblivion_.

"There is nothing to forgive, child, though it is admirable that you care so deeply for your friend. I'm proud. My cute disciple has come so far in forming harmonious bonds with his peers. Now, what have I told you about kneeling on the cold stone floor?"

He immediately rose. "My apologies, Master. Please discipline me as you see fit."

Master Prune patted Lizi on the head with his mustache. "Nonsense. It just so happens that I would like to stretch these old bones of mine, so I will take care of it. Show your friend the hospitality of Stone Temple and make sure Mengtao joins you." An amused huff. "That silly girl, a little mischief is all fine and well, but she has trouble knowing her own limits sometimes."

"Understood. But..." He hesitated. "Master, you don't have bones."

"Ohoho, are you certain about that?"

Before Lizi could come up with a reply to _that,_ Master Prune winked and flew off.

During the whole exchange, Rangsiman wished he could understand what the spirit was saying, because it was a little ridiculous to watch Lizi converse so seriously with Master Prune repeating variations of _pruu, hru_ and _hrrp._

Not that he would bring it up. Lizi would probably lecture him for his disrespect and give him the cold shoulder afterwards. That guy could really hold a grudge when he wanted to.

"Let's go to the living room. I'll prepare ginger saffron tea and snacks, then go find Mengtao. She's probably napping in the bamboo forest again."

Rangisman's chest prickled with warmth. _Stupid mixed messages. Stupid mixed feelings._ _So what if he hates spicy things and Mengtao doesn't drink tea? So what if he's preparing that tea because he knows I like it? That doesn't mean anything__. _

"Wait, why don't you just call her? Or shoot her a text?"

Lizi gestured at him to sit down and disappeared into the kitchen. "Warning her that I'm coming means she'll have time to hide and lay down traps. Mengtao may be loud and lazy, but she's a prodigy at stealth. Who do you think was on the receiving end of her pranks all these years?"

Wincing, he said, "That must've been... not fun."

"Mn," he agreed. "She has them down to an art form. It's almost as impressive as it is frustrating—if she showed a sliver of such dedication in training, her improvement rate would spike up dramatically."

"That's Mengtao for you," he joked, joining Lizi in the kitchen. "Ever try using an app to track her location?"

A bemused blink. "You can do that?"

_As expected of the guy who uses his phone as a stopwatch._ "Yeah. I mean, you should ask permission first or else it's an invasion of privacy, but she'd probably say yes as long as you let her have access to your location in return. It's useful. Practical too."

Pinching the bridge of his nose, Lizi muttered, "It's _that_ simple. I can't believe it. All that time wasted that could've been spent on training..."

"Sorry?"

"Not your fault. I should broaden my education. What other uses do phones have?"

He smiled, pleased that Lizi wasn't as taciturn than his usual self today. His rapt attention directed solely at him was—well, it was a bit thrilling_._ Intoxicating. He could get drunk off this alone. "Well..."

Using his phone as an example, he launched into an explanation about its functions, peeking at Lizi once in a while. He was the model student, listening intently and occasionally asking questions as he worked. Rangsiman would've offered to help, but Lizi was always weirdly adamant about proper hospitality, so he didn't push.

"And that's about it," he finished. "I'm no expert though. If you want to learn more, you could ask around or do personal research."

"Thank you. Your knowledge was more than sufficient." He waved him off. "Now go seat yourself. I'm supposed to treat you like a guest, not a source of useful information."

"No worries, what are friends for?" _And I'm supposed to treat you like a friend, not a source of_—the damned black shirt flashed through his head—_bad thoughts, bad thoughts! Stop thinking about that!_

There was a soft _clink_ as Lizi set two teacups on the table, followed by a plate of gingersnaps and freshly cut sand pears. Without warning, he said, "You've never lost control over your pyrokinetic abilities until today, and I haven't forgotten about your strange behavior either. Explain."

"Uh."

Thankfully, the kettle whistled, interrupting his would-be interrogation.

Lizi moved to go turn off the stove and prepare the tea. As he did, Rangsiman secretly pulled out his phone and texted Mengtao.

Mengtao  
  
**Today** 7:12 AM  
help!!! snacks in living room  
  
ajhdudkm did u sgay SNACKS??!?! there bettee b dumplings OwO  
  
wait wut do u mean bi help?  
r u ok???  
  
is lizi beingf a big fat meanie. he is isnt he. hehehe time to teST MY PEACHY SLAMM 3.0  
  
Mengtao no  
  
mengtao YES

"You're texting her," Lizi stated in that knowing, resigned way of his. He didn't bother changing the inflection of his voice to create the illusion of a question. _Unnecessary_, he'd probably say.

"Yeah."

"Thought so." Pouring the tea, he said, "I'll bring out the shoutao; they should be done about now."

"What are those?"

"Longevity peach buns," he translated, setting the bamboo steamer down. "It's a mouthful in English. Traditionally, they're served to the elderly to celebrate their old age, but since when does Mengtao care about tradition?"

Rangsiman watched the steam curl, caressing Lizi's face like a lover would. Like how he would. If he was his lover. "Cute."

_Shit, I said that out loud. Abort abort abort—_

"Mengtao said that too."

_What?_

"She also cried because they were too cute to eat, then inhaled them all the second I turned my back. Are you going to do the same?" A rare teasing lilt entered his voice. "Be careful. She doesn't show mercy when it comes to food." 

_Oh, he meant the peach buns._

"She won't get mad if I try one, right?"

A pause. "No."

"Is that a _no, she won't,_ or a _no, she will definitely will?"_

"Your choice." His tone made it sound a lot more like_ your funeral_.

Deciding not to risk it, he reached for the gingersnaps instead. They tasted great with the tea. He snuck a glance at Lizi, feeling uncharacteristically shy.

Somehow, he seemed perfectly content to sit there and slowly savor a pear slice, back ramrod straight and not one hair out of place.

_The way he's sitting, you'd think Master Prune would barge in any second now and test him on his posture,_ he thought with a snort. _Not that he'd need to. His posture is flawless. His face is flawless. His body—damn it, STOP THINKING ABOUT THAT. _

_ _Is this karma for my peaceful teenage years? I respect teens a lot more now. How can anyone cope with this? _ _

_Argh, guess I should start a conversation or_ _something_. He fished his brain for a topic and came up with, "Why are there two cups?"

_Shit, is this flirting? Am I flirting? What am I doing?!  
_

Oblivious to Rangsiman's mounting panic, he answered, "That's because Mengtao is the picky type that hates tea but loves tea-flavored snacks."

"I meant, why did you pour yourself a cup? You hate this tea blend."

"I don't hate it."

"You've barely touched your tea."

He immediately downed it like a shot, not quite suppressing his flinch. "Sorry, didn't hear you. Could you repeat that?"

_Fuck he's cute._ "I said, you—"

"SNACKS!" Mengtao pounced, scarfing down the food like it was her first meal in years.

With a sigh, Lizi handed her a jelly drink pouch. "Slow down. If not for propriety, then for the sake of your stomach." 

"Awwww I wuv you too, sugar plum!" She flung her arms around Lizi, beaming with the force of a hundred suns. "Hi, Daeng!"

Conflicted, he contemplated whether he should be jealous of Lizi, who was currently being hugged, or Mengtao, who was doing the hugging. He settled on both. "Hi, Mengtao. How're you?"

"Amazing! My two besties are getting along and not being dumb rivals or whatever. I'm so happy, hehe. Oh, and I asked Master if we could go on a summer vacation together, and he said yes! Three days at the beach, isn't that great?"

Lizi crossed his arms. "This better not be an excuse to skip training."

"Bleh, fine, it's a training trip. Still awesome though. Daeng's coming with us because we haven't hung out in _forever_, and Master said a change of scenery might do him some good. Hey Daeng, I saw the place you burned." She slurped her jelly drink loudly, giving him a thumbs-up. "There's better ways to get out of training, but points for effort!"

_Oh no, _he thought, feeling distinctly faint_._

"Rangsiman's not like you. He takes training seriously."

A dramatic gasp. "Oh you sweet summer child."

"You also have a summer birthday, Mengtao. In case you've forgotten."

Weakly, Rangsiman asked, "What if I already have plans? Important plans. Like... attending a funeral." _The funeral of my sanity_.

"But Rika said you didn't?"

_Paprika, you traitor. _He had no choice but to cave in. "Well, okay."

"That's the spirit! Time for some fun in the sun!" she cheered.

_Save me._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I may have rushed while writing. Please, if you may, tell me what parts you liked in particular & what parts you're looking forward to. It motivates me to write. I eagerly anticipate your input.
> 
> Thank you for reading! ^^


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